Hi and welcome — my name is Tony.

Tony is a Sacred Sex and Intimacy Coach and Somatic Practitioner based in Aotearoa New Zealand, whose work explores the intricate relationship between the body, identity, desire, belonging and the often-unseen forces that shape who we become.

For much of his early life, Tony carried the belief that he was broken beyond repair. He learned to numb, avoid and perform his way through an inner world of chaos, becoming adept at navigating life while remaining largely disconnected from himself. Like many of us, he adapted to the world around him long before he understood what those adaptations were costing him. His journey towards a different way of living began when the story he had constructed about himself could no longer hold.

Years later, a friend told him he needed to become more embodied. At the time, he had little understanding of what that meant. Over the following twenty-five years, the question led him through Hakomi somatic psychotherapy, trauma-informed practice, peer support, conscious relating, sacred sexuality, indigenous bodywork and immersive initiatory work exploring shadow, intimacy and the human condition. Together, these experiences became part of Tony’s own soul initiation, a lived journey that challenged him to confront the shadows he carried, question the stories he had inherited, and begin to see how deeply the unseen forces shaping his life had become woven into who he believed himself to be.

His path has led him to walk between worlds: the tangible and the mysterious, the scientifically explored and the spiritually felt, the knowledge we can articulate and the truths we can only approach through experience. Grounded in somatic practice, trauma-informed approaches and an evolving understanding of the nervous system, Tony remains drawn to the mysteries that lie beyond what we think we know. He is interested in what becomes possible when we dare to look beyond the familiar, to peer through the veils separating the known from the unknown, without needing to reduce mystery to explanation or abandon discernment in the pursuit of meaning.

Today, Tony creates spaces where gay men can explore the intricate terrain of intimacy, connection and belonging, bringing curiosity to the ways we are shaped through our encounters with one another. He is drawn to the space between people, where our histories meet, our assumptions collide, our defences emerge and the possibility of genuine connection begins. It is here, within the often-unseen dynamics of relating, that we may catch glimpses of the forces shaping not only how we experience one another, but who we become in the process. Rather than offering definitive explanations, Tony invites a deeper exploration of the human experience, one that makes room for uncertainty, contradiction, discovery and the possibility that understanding ourselves may begin with seeing ourselves differently in the presence of another.

Tony does not position himself as a guru, a fixer or someone who has arrived at a final understanding of himself. He is a practitioner, a fellow traveller and an ongoing student of the mysteries of being human, bringing grounded inquiry and reverence for the unknown into the same conversation. For him, the work is not about arriving at a final answer, but remaining open to the questions, encounters and experiences that can transform how we see ourselves, one another and the worlds we inhabit.

Hakomi practitioner – Somatic practitioner - Mentor – Embodiment Counsellor - Shaman – Healer – Tantric and Romiromi Bodywork Practitioner – Trauma informed facilitation - Men’s Workshop facilitator and hearth circle host - Temples arts and ISTA graduate,